What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
The air was thick with penises
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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