I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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