I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
