The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Randomize
