Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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