May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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