he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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