Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
