guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
