i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
