I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
