I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
