508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
