Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
