Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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