were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
he just fucked me for my cheese.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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