I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
