Only a mothe r could love this liver
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
How does one acquire holy water?
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
