why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
