used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
