Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
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Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
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You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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