Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
