Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
