She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
