dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
