If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
