dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
