I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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