Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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