he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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