I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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