i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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