hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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