I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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