The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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