Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
