i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
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sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
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Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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