Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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