tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I need to align my fucking chakras
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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