My nipple is on Facebook.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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