I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
