That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize