i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
We got so high we made milksteak
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I think he's only dating me for my ass...