i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
