Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Randomize
