Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
