can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
