he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
