I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Sorry about my life...
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
