She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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