O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
